Journals9
Newest
I'm trans-race !
1 min read
Fun Fact about myself
I'm a troll, end of story.
all of the apologize journals are pure pity journals but some parts are true apologies but 96% of the stuff in the journals is damage control to the max.
but all the drawings are mines, I'm not an art thief or some crap. I do care about some people but some people on this site in a new career.
I'm 100% sarcastic and wouldn't be taken seriously okay because that's a bad thing to do on the internet.
Good bye or what we say in America
**inserts middle finger here**
JK LOL
I'm a troll, end of story.
all of the apologize journals are pure pity journals but some parts are true apologies but 96% of the stuff in the journals is damage control to the max.
but all the drawings are mines, I'm not an art thief or some crap. I do care about some people but some people on this site in a new career.
I'm 100% sarcastic and wouldn't be taken seriously okay because that's a bad thing to do on the internet.
Good bye or what we say in America
**inserts middle finger here**
JK LOL
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the truth.
3 min read
okay yes, im a troll - the one who fucks with people for a good laugh
yes all the artwork posted on all of my accounts is mines not traced or stolen in anyway same with my characters (not that ones that was adopts). i have mental issues , im autistic ( no, im not using the autistic card bullshit) , i have depression and last year wasnt a good year for me mainly in december but that doesn't give me the right to be an asshole to everyone because of my real life. i really wanted to kill myself but i don't wanna leave the internet knowing that a lot of people hate me and having that thought after killing myself but
im okay know and i cut off toxic people and role models from my life
hide any more it's getting boring , you can block me on my new acc. i block people on my new account who are block on this account . i don't wanna be harass on this , shit of a site anymore and visa via. i don't care really if you still hate me but don't be a dick around it
yes all the artwork posted on all of my accounts is mines not traced or stolen in anyway same with my characters (not that ones that was adopts). i have mental issues , im autistic ( no, im not using the autistic card bullshit) , i have depression and last year wasnt a good year for me mainly in december but that doesn't give me the right to be an asshole to everyone because of my real life. i really wanted to kill myself but i don't wanna leave the internet knowing that a lot of people hate me and having that thought after killing myself but
im okay know and i cut off toxic people and role models from my life
hide any more it's getting boring , you can block me on my new acc. i block people on my new account who are block on this account . i don't wanna be harass on this , shit of a site anymore and visa via. i don't care really if you still hate me but don't be a dick around it
you don't have to trust me but im still trying to fix anything with a huge ass band-aid but don't be an asshole and spam my acc, i never did that to you so why would you do that to me ??
if i own you something note me like i own someone 1800 points ?? but i don't get payed until july so yepp if you still want them idk you are not an asshole calling me names over some points okay ??
please don't talk about it that drama, i don't have ill feelings on the users who hate me or harass me on this site i only know i fucked up like a lot
i wanna upload my new art now it's more fresh but still cringy but
i change a lot things and about myself like shit, i even lied to myself about being a pansexual (i have no problems with pans)
i dump my characters old info and maybe giving some away idk i know i lied too many , i know and i hate myself no more lies, i just wanna be myself a semi-mute artist who draws furries and humans. you can hate me , like me , or in between try to help me not bash me like damn i'm 14 - almost 15.
i will link my acc in july or the end of the month idk also, someone on my tumblr link me this blog ( drama--echidna.tumblr.com/ )
i maybe will link my account that the end of the month or the start of july
again im sorry for the actions / lies - i know that i was a fucking asshole , bitch , and shady motherfucker and i want all of that behavior behind me - what doesn't kill you makes you stronger.
again im sorry for the actions / lies - i know that i was a fucking asshole , bitch , and shady motherfucker and i want all of that behavior behind me - what doesn't kill you makes you stronger.
-jay
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update.
4 min read
well, I just found out that I have bald spots and my hair is coming out because the stress of this situation this site is awful and plain terrifying to say the least.
am I allowed back on this site or no? I know I spammed someone (whoever you are),mean rude to multiple, lied, and used people for points but come on I'm only 14
like the teenager years is the years of your life you make mistakes and look up on like "what the hell was wrong with me." I'm being attacked by adults people who're 20+ years old
is sick and childish on their part bullying kids is gross.
now about this user: ghost-memories.deviantart.com/
comments.deviantart.com/4/3773…
She scammed people out of commissions, YCHs, and character trades, fucked up right? but she's the same age as me and we both fucked up (I don't believe a troll will scam people out of hard work, that's too low.) but I didn't try hiding everything or the truth because I know I was bat shit horrible to everyone and I saw this comment; comments.deviantart.com/4/3773… I wanted to reply to xT3CHNO-W1NGx but I was thinking "she blocked me because of my actions but she started the savexyrina hasttag to save my life and looked up to my characters..." I only have one true friend and that's Sapphy-chan7 and another user but I don't want name drop them because I don't want them to get involved in this.
now imagine getting your inbox full and I mean FULL of hateful comments - what would you do? cry or reply back to the comments like an asshole or hide them all and get back to your life? I wanted to cry, I'm playing have 2-5 people hating me like I already do but not 30+ and even fucking adults being assholes being I dislike their friend's character. (I know my characters aren't the best but it makes them special to me.)
drama is getting out of hand SOMEONE CALL KEEMSTAR OF DRAMAALERT THIS SHIT IS FIERCE AND OUT OF CONTROL.
I wanna reveal my new account but I'm too afraid for the comments still.
I'm sorry for the people that I really cared about, hell I trusted them more than my real life, even if this the internet.
Sapphy-chan7 N-NANI xT3CHNO-W1NGx Teslarossa and I'm not naming two other users (you know who you are because the drama that started and destroyed our relationship in the pasr came back and it's permanent destroyed and I think we has a whole can't fix the relationship because of this, just want a whole year and maybe we can fix our relationship.
Jay out (if people are still calling me Rocket, I'm going to fucking flip) and please respond to this journal in the comments not in a journal or video; I don't want this drama to spread anymore. It's April and everyone would be over obsessing over me for comments and pageviews. Oh more journals or videos, I want that one rant video on me up ; no more videos on me or journals (please delete your journal(journals) because it's pure cancer to the drama cancer.
am I allowed back on this site or no? I know I spammed someone (whoever you are),mean rude to multiple, lied, and used people for points but come on I'm only 14
like the teenager years is the years of your life you make mistakes and look up on like "what the hell was wrong with me." I'm being attacked by adults people who're 20+ years old
is sick and childish on their part bullying kids is gross.
now about this user: ghost-memories.deviantart.com/
comments.deviantart.com/4/3773…
She scammed people out of commissions, YCHs, and character trades, fucked up right? but she's the same age as me and we both fucked up (I don't believe a troll will scam people out of hard work, that's too low.) but I didn't try hiding everything or the truth because I know I was bat shit horrible to everyone and I saw this comment; comments.deviantart.com/4/3773… I wanted to reply to xT3CHNO-W1NGx but I was thinking "she blocked me because of my actions but she started the savexyrina hasttag to save my life and looked up to my characters..." I only have one true friend and that's Sapphy-chan7 and another user but I don't want name drop them because I don't want them to get involved in this.
now imagine getting your inbox full and I mean FULL of hateful comments - what would you do? cry or reply back to the comments like an asshole or hide them all and get back to your life? I wanted to cry, I'm playing have 2-5 people hating me like I already do but not 30+ and even fucking adults being assholes being I dislike their friend's character. (I know my characters aren't the best but it makes them special to me.)
drama is getting out of hand SOMEONE CALL KEEMSTAR OF DRAMAALERT THIS SHIT IS FIERCE AND OUT OF CONTROL.
I wanna reveal my new account but I'm too afraid for the comments still.
I'm sorry for the people that I really cared about, hell I trusted them more than my real life, even if this the internet.
Sapphy-chan7 N-NANI xT3CHNO-W1NGx Teslarossa and I'm not naming two other users (you know who you are because the drama that started and destroyed our relationship in the pasr came back and it's permanent destroyed and I think we has a whole can't fix the relationship because of this, just want a whole year and maybe we can fix our relationship.
Jay out (if people are still calling me Rocket, I'm going to fucking flip) and please respond to this journal in the comments not in a journal or video; I don't want this drama to spread anymore. It's April and everyone would be over obsessing over me for comments and pageviews. Oh more journals or videos, I want that one rant video on me up ; no more videos on me or journals (please delete your journal(journals) because it's pure cancer to the drama cancer.
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!
10 min read
This journal is about the pure bullshit nature of this whole cancer drama that has destroy everything that I tried to fix and im upset to the breaking point, now let's get started.
hello once again , is the drama still going on ? Is everyone still bitching about my edgy actions and making those cancer spreading journals? It's March now and if people are still talking about me after this happen in January, need to do something else with their lives and need to leave the drama zone because they clearly don't have anything else to do.
What the fuck is this site coming to ?? , DramaAlert but with art?? I bet someone will make deviantARTDramaAlert since this site is full of the shit and there's nothing anyone can do about it. No, I'm not making a response video to the funny "rant" video or a response journal to it because my supporters (I'm not calling them "white knights" since they all had good points about supporting me.) already did that for me by pointing out the mega flaws, You don't see me doing that shit on YouTube since I don't want to cause mega drama like this.
This whole thing is basically bullying, but i know i was a bullied myself and became one but i never went so far has making a video, I made journals but my point is that one person makes a video and everyone starts attacking someone not even having a talk with the victim (aka myself since I have been bullied because of this) but im not saying that the situation is like my own but it's a chain reaction basically and I really hate everyone who just bashed me not even trying to talk to me to get my side but biased opinions I guess because everyone's is judging me even more now,it's just "omgz this bitch is horrible lets send her ass comments with insult and fuckin' spam !!!!!!1111!" To the biased users, you guys need to some help like I got, since you have nothing else to do with yourselves but bash and spread this drama like not one of you wanted my side to the damn story but just bash and make cancer journals about me and starting more shit, I bet I have a fucking anti stamp or group on me because of this whole thing.
I even got fucking death threats and people telling me to kill myself, from my tumblr accounts and two of my email accounts, that's fucking crossing the line. Everyone is being hypocritical about this; I'm not going to take biased opinions to heart by some random people I never even like or talked to, I came onto this site to post my art and see others' and my own improvement. I didn't do anti stamps or artwork because that's fucking childish, I'm not even close to becoming another PE013 at all just because I have mental issues and lash out at users who I really dislike doesn't mean I'm just like her.
Do you guys attack people in real life? I don't because I'm too shy to say something but I don't think half of the people who hate me
actually attack and harass people because that's more fucked. This whole drama made me a better person and the video made me realized I was a shady user who bulled others to get what I want and I'm officially done with the drama scene and this old drama because drama is killing deviantart and making a lot of people leaving deviantart, I mean a lot I have been on dA going on different profiles and people are leaving because of drama that's going around.
I made poll instead of me replying to the comments because I don't wanna face the rude and hateful comments that I'm going to get because my anxiety and I don't wanna be labeled as an asshole anymore by replying with rude comments with edgy "rude" insults. I came on this site to get away from my problems but I created this fake persona and made everything worse, this whole situation is gone out of control. I don't wanna think about my negative side anymore because I don't wanna be Rocket or the other fake fucking names I made up again
Do I wanna an apologize from SanicFlanic? and my final opinion on her.
No, since she wasn't even thinking about what blacklash I will get from this at all and had ANOTHER account and I also have one, she should had ask for one and I don't wanna give her one now - I bet she got no backlash at all. deviantart rant videos are cancer and I'm not going to watch one again since I didn't know that some have to go through this, at least do a video on someone who's hated on this site greatly not some fan artist with 300 or 200+ watchers. She's not getting my sorry for a long time and I'm making sure of that. What I think of her now? I don't really care about her, she can still do her deviantart rants video and I hope she gets better at it by telling people not to attack the user but to point out their flaws in a light-hearted manner but making fucking journals spreading the drama like damn, she should had talk to me at least because I forget she even existed like I blocked her and she left my mind every since because I had better things to think about than her at that time but I can do me and she can do her, I think we can never can be okay or be friends because of this. She never commented or talk to me when this whole drama started, not once and I always wonder why...
Are you going to change and do you mean it?
yes because this going back and forth shit is bullshit. I'm 14, teenagers make dumb mistake when under stressed and I hate having enemies on a damn art site. I just wanna upload my artwork of my characters and my friends, I couldn't even draw my characters for over a month because they remind me of the horrible and shady shit I did, characters someone looked up to and multiple enjoyed, characters I worked hard on to this day. I don't want this to happen again because this is stressful and some told me to ignore the video and comments but I don't wanna log on to dA with hate comments and mentions in my inbox, that night of the video being linked to me, I was afraid to go to sleep and I didn't get sleep for days and I still feel like removing myself of this world since i'm still just a waste to this Earth and that feeling will never go away. I'm okay with some hating me but not over 20+ people hating me, getting messages about how I'm a horrible person, my self esteem doesn't exist anymore because of this but I know it's just the internet...
My changing my whole scene:
no more callout journals because they was cancer and fucking retarded like really, I can't even believe people commented on them.
no getting into drama even if it's around people I know because it's going to get out of control like this but many worse.
no more attacking users over they damn characters, do whatever the hell you want with them as all you're not stealing.
I'm thinking about posting my new dA during my spring break (aka this week) and if anyone, I mean anyone even comments on
my new dA with a long text of hate, you will be blocked and not even reply to it because I wanna stay away from drama and negative for now and forever.
You spam my BlitzStars account if you wanna spread your hate about me there, be immature like I was but I will still read those comments since that page was also full with hateful journals and comments. I just wanna make friends and show my artwork to everyone, I want constructive criticism on my art , not myself as a person.
I wanna come back to this site just to upload my artwork again, something I enjoy doing, this site is my only safe place since my life is hell basically most of the time. This is fucked man, no matter what side you're on because this has destroy everything that I try to build up on this site even though I can lash out on to others because of their own rude comments and stupidity like EVERYONE ON THIS DAMN SITE IS FAKE OR SOMETIMES RUDE ! I seen some popular artists get mad when people spam or ask them for requests but they never get called out, an really popular artist even claimed someone was stealing their artwork and tracing but send a mod of people after them and they did nothing wrong but no, I'm the only mean asshole on this site - fucking false.
This is herd mentality and it's again fucked and stupid.
it's almost April, this shit happened in April. I know I'm in the wrong for sending that note and hateful comments to others. I'm going to kept moving forward and everyone else can to, you can kept watching my actions on my new account just to check up on me and make sure I'm not fucking up by making idiotic mistakes, I'm 14 and I don't wanna make mistakes - we're all humans and mistakes makes us humans and and this mistake of mines made a think about my actions and I shouldn't even down that stuff without thinking about the consequences and all backlash I will get. I'm seriously done with this and drama overall, it's Drama of 2016, have you guys seen Youtube lately also?, Drama is the true cancer of this site and it's killing it.
You don't have to like me, my artwork, my characters, my attitude, or my actions but at least respect me because I'm here to stay and I'm not backing down now. You can make all the cancerous videos and journals you want about me but please, don't even mention me because I don't want have a debate over my actions - I have better things to do since this drama isn't helping everyone at this point - give me the chance to change by being nice not meaning hateful to me because that starts up my old and shitty attitude and that's how I got here , history can repeat it's but I don't want this to happen again or to someone else.
jay out
Links , I'm not showing all the messages (mainly the e-mails for personal reasons.)
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I was a huge fake.
18 min read
You don't have to believe me, stay closed minded all you want and spread your hateful opinions on me. I'm just explaining myself since none of this is right or helpful to anyone. I wanted to do a Google hangout but my speaking skills are horrible since I rarely speak in real life. I know I'm going to get a lot of comments on this but to be honest, I didn't read any of my messages and I'm not planning to, I'm submitting this journal through sta.sh files since you can log in through sta.sh, I didn't even view the comments on my page or anyway else. I never logged back into my account (until now) since I had my nervous breakdown when I posted the suicide journal (I'm not / was mocking actual users who killed themselves on this site, I'm not that cold.) and instead of logging back into dA, I been on Tumblr since I was too scared to when come back to dA.
I went to therapy because of this whole thing and other real life issues that I have been dealing with since the age of 9 years old, my life isn't perfect at all. No one has the perfect life or attitude and you gotta understand that. Everyone is being hypocritical about this situation and it's pretty clear. I can't believe was even taking serious or even had friends, I was the dumbest bitch on dA and made stupid statements, trying to hard to be funny to make friends. I can't believe that SanicFlanic taken my "hate" note (more like bitch note) so seriously that she didn't to make a video about it. Now, I know this journal itself will have a lot of comments, maybe it's whole video, 5634578346 journals about me but it will start up more drama so much that the drama fueling whore will not even like it. Again. You don't have to believe anything I say and be closed minded and continuing to be a hate fuel machine, I will love to watch the videos you will have on yourself in the future. Also, don't be like "too long, didn't read" because nothing will make sense if you read half of this journal. Sorry for any misspellings or grammar mistakes, I'm not a skilled typer or speller.
What happened that night last night;
Rocket is dead but I’m not, I'm going to stop using fake names because it's stupid and pointless, Jay is a shorten version of my real name (Jayla) and it makes more sense, even though I don't like my real name but I'm sticking with it. Okay, I tried to kill myself but I just had nervous breakdown over the rant video and journals, I'm only 14 and I can't take that kind of pressure, I'm not some adult or a teen with high confidence, that's not me and will never be me. I'm not mental right in mind since I try to kill myself over anything that happened and I don't mean any of that stuff now to be honest. Please don't open old wounds, I don't want to harm myself anymore or anyone else I know. I don't live a happy life, do you think I'm perfect; I'm not some flawless beautiful teen who has all the friends in high school. So I was basically was losing it when making up the user "them" because the journals wasn't helping at all just spreading unneeded drama, some users I didn't even know existed was mentioning me, I was going crazy almost since it open wounds from my childhood that I'm trying to forgot for years to come and this had to happen because of some negative note and comments that didn't even hurt my own feelings, I can't believe those comments hurt someone's else. If you have nothing to do with me or the note itself, why are you making a journal?, do you want me to leave because of something for a couple of toxic and trying to hard to be rude messages, even if I haven't sent something rude to you? You're getting involved just to act like some big shot being rude to me; hypocritical much? You acting rude to me is basically showing you have a rude side also right?
Maybe not, I really don't remember anything from the past year because memory loss because of antidepressants and stress (I been depressed for the last four years) and going to therapy makes me forget about my own personal problems that I wanted to hide from my watchers (that I have left) for the longest just to look like the perfect dA user that had all the watchers and friends, egotistical I know. Now the video itself, I was laughing to beginning to the end ! I'm not even joking. I watched the video after I came home from therapy and I had to watch so the video will hurt my dying confidence and I starting laughing because I just realize that someone had actually taken my rude comments seriously like, I'm laughing because who will take some 14 girl seriously? My "rude" comments was so edgy and bad that they can cut diamonds, I can't believe that I typed that note myself, I'm so embarrassed that I did. I never called Envy out on her comments or told anyone else about it, she went overboard with the video like I was laughing about whole "DON'T ATTACK HER" thing like what??? Again, I never made a personal attack on her, fuck it. we're both in the wrong since she called me "butthurt" for dropping out of her secret Santa thing and my reaction to her unwatching me, I think I still have the note of her calling me "selfish" for not drawing a picture for whoever the hell she told me to draw for, I think I just said I didn't see any of the characters I like or can draw, I'm not a professional artist like have you seen my artwork? (before I hidden everything I submitted in storage so people will not spam them as well) It's simple at best but whatever, I should had did the picture but I was a huge bitch about it and this drama would had never happen.
NOW
I went to therapy because of this whole thing and other real life issues that I have been dealing with since the age of 9 years old, my life isn't perfect at all. No one has the perfect life or attitude and you gotta understand that. Everyone is being hypocritical about this situation and it's pretty clear. I can't believe was even taking serious or even had friends, I was the dumbest bitch on dA and made stupid statements, trying to hard to be funny to make friends. I can't believe that SanicFlanic taken my "hate" note (more like bitch note) so seriously that she didn't to make a video about it. Now, I know this journal itself will have a lot of comments, maybe it's whole video, 5634578346 journals about me but it will start up more drama so much that the drama fueling whore will not even like it. Again. You don't have to believe anything I say and be closed minded and continuing to be a hate fuel machine, I will love to watch the videos you will have on yourself in the future. Also, don't be like "too long, didn't read" because nothing will make sense if you read half of this journal. Sorry for any misspellings or grammar mistakes, I'm not a skilled typer or speller.
What happened that night last night;
Rocket is dead but I’m not, I'm going to stop using fake names because it's stupid and pointless, Jay is a shorten version of my real name (Jayla) and it makes more sense, even though I don't like my real name but I'm sticking with it. Okay, I tried to kill myself but I just had nervous breakdown over the rant video and journals, I'm only 14 and I can't take that kind of pressure, I'm not some adult or a teen with high confidence, that's not me and will never be me. I'm not mental right in mind since I try to kill myself over anything that happened and I don't mean any of that stuff now to be honest. Please don't open old wounds, I don't want to harm myself anymore or anyone else I know. I don't live a happy life, do you think I'm perfect; I'm not some flawless beautiful teen who has all the friends in high school. So I was basically was losing it when making up the user "them" because the journals wasn't helping at all just spreading unneeded drama, some users I didn't even know existed was mentioning me, I was going crazy almost since it open wounds from my childhood that I'm trying to forgot for years to come and this had to happen because of some negative note and comments that didn't even hurt my own feelings, I can't believe those comments hurt someone's else. If you have nothing to do with me or the note itself, why are you making a journal?, do you want me to leave because of something for a couple of toxic and trying to hard to be rude messages, even if I haven't sent something rude to you? You're getting involved just to act like some big shot being rude to me; hypocritical much? You acting rude to me is basically showing you have a rude side also right?
Maybe not, I really don't remember anything from the past year because memory loss because of antidepressants and stress (I been depressed for the last four years) and going to therapy makes me forget about my own personal problems that I wanted to hide from my watchers (that I have left) for the longest just to look like the perfect dA user that had all the watchers and friends, egotistical I know. Now the video itself, I was laughing to beginning to the end ! I'm not even joking. I watched the video after I came home from therapy and I had to watch so the video will hurt my dying confidence and I starting laughing because I just realize that someone had actually taken my rude comments seriously like, I'm laughing because who will take some 14 girl seriously? My "rude" comments was so edgy and bad that they can cut diamonds, I can't believe that I typed that note myself, I'm so embarrassed that I did. I never called Envy out on her comments or told anyone else about it, she went overboard with the video like I was laughing about whole "DON'T ATTACK HER" thing like what??? Again, I never made a personal attack on her, fuck it. we're both in the wrong since she called me "butthurt" for dropping out of her secret Santa thing and my reaction to her unwatching me, I think I still have the note of her calling me "selfish" for not drawing a picture for whoever the hell she told me to draw for, I think I just said I didn't see any of the characters I like or can draw, I'm not a professional artist like have you seen my artwork? (before I hidden everything I submitted in storage so people will not spam them as well) It's simple at best but whatever, I should had did the picture but I was a huge bitch about it and this drama would had never happen.
NOW
MY REAL FINAL STATEMENT
The video was unneeded because I can swallow my pride (aka something that I don't have) if she wanted a apologize, she has another account that I never even known about so she should had note me about the note and she would had my apologize but nope. I blocked her from her Sonic account not the other one, I have three accounts that are still open like my BlitzStars one since I never blocked her on there also, I even forgot she even exist since when I blocked people or when people blocked me, I forgot all about them and get on with my life and the should had to but still, she's in the wrong and I'm in the wrong, the journals are in the wrong (good or not I don't care), and same with the comments, EVERYONE IS THE WRONG, but I'm in the deepest part of the wrong with Envy like in hell deep that Satan will not even dare to touch us.
Okay about my characters and adopts,
They still belong to me and always, I'm not giving them anyway but I was too egoistical about them since people do like them and they are the best oc's I made in two years because my old ones suck and unoriginal. My characters are based off of how I want to be in real life but my characters are not prefect and I never claimed they're the best characters in the sonic fanbase , everyone has flaws but since Xyrina is named after this spam account, I made three new characters and the ones feature on this account will still be used. I'm not selling anymore characters and I really wished I didn't sell that space custom that someone made for me but it's too late now to get the adopts I sold back at this time.
Now this is part where I'm disappointed for everyone who's attacking everyone who is on my side....you guys are more awful than me and once again hypocritical since you're being rude to my supporters, that's toxic and uncalled for. That's pretty rude by itself, just saying. It's their opinion and you shouldn't be bashing and attacking them, your opinion will be invalided when you start calling the supporters horrible things that I can't even think of, your own statement dies and doesn't support your argument anymore. I censored the user who send me the message username so they don't get harassed, by the way whoever "leaked" my Tumblr like celebrity nudes, you're the great because I would have never got this info. (by the way, I changed accounts so people will not send me negative messages.) I mean everything I said in that message, grown the fuck up. There's some user (again I forget things) that I own points to and they can called me "shit" and they're older than me like they pay bills, their partner says they have to pay bills who a adult bullying a minor, that doesn't sound right at all and I got blacklisted from two users so I can't commissioned them anymore....I'm okay with that. (They are the user who made the space custom).
Someone 20+ woman made a journal on me and it had something across the lines of me hating her friend's oc (who is also 20+ years old) because of a shipping, look I care less about people's ocs now and only care for my own now and for now on, but you're worry about some random ass 14 year old girl hating (hate that I only told someone once about but not all over the place like some) and both of you guys are in your twenties though like why do you care anyway? My opinion change on the oc and the user themselves, I don't even care for both of them and the user should just ignore me but seriously , I don't make hate stamps on the users or ocs I dislike like come on people, forget about me and move on.
But for the rude comments (plus journals) and the video itself (if it's still up, I'm too lazy to check), it drove me to suicide, do you feel better about yourself driving a young girl close to death? You're a horrible person and down right sick in the head. My family wanted to contact YouTube to take down the video and deviantart to report the users who the comments and journals that drove me to suicide if I did really committed suicide, you would have been feeling awful for killing a teen who made dumb edgy "rude" comments and horrible mistakes, you're acting my childish than my delete and old call out journals. I thought the people who are against me wasn't the rude individuals at all.
Why did I act all "badass" and "rude", okay...I was bullied in school and that hellish rage was bottled up inside and instead of talking to people I know in real life about it, I was like "let's be a huge ass to everyone so they can feel my pain!" smartest plan in the galaxy, give me a medal but to be real, not everyone on dA is nice people like have you seen half of the people on this site Everyone has to understand that dA is full of sunshine and happiest with rainbow and sprinkle unicorns people but to be fair and well...the video shouldn't had been uploaded. She has two accounts and I only block her on one and I have another account as well, I would have been happy to but the video really? Did she wanted a respond video of me bitching around? No since I know better than to do that and also, I can't edit videos for nothing. Why I'm stop using fake names? All of them gave me a fake identity and personality that I wanted to have in real life. I'm actually some shy black girl who rarely talks in school, only talks to my close friend circle, gets bad grades time to time, and draws sonic and whatnot, I'm not popular in school. I acted like a big shot since I don't have to look into someone's eyes to tell them off since I rarely speak up for myself or yours.
now I know I will get comments just like this:
"WHAT ! FAKE YOUR DEATH YOU STUPID BITCH!"
.....I have no respond to this since I don't want to go back and forward with anyone at this point because I'm bored of it. Again, be closed minded and hard headed like I was before but seriously, you have no proof since you're not in my life. I just had a nervous breakdown and had to go to therapy for this and other problems, I'm still counting myself as suicidal since this whole thing about me depress and questioning my own actions.
"DON'T COME BACK TO DA YOU WHORE!"
Sorry but this is the only site I can post my artwork that is easy to use
and you can't tell me to leave since I'm a starting artist who wants to improve like everyone else but I'm going to stop being egoistical (aka fake confidence) to make myself feel like a real person with friends who care for me.
"WHAT'S YOUR NEW DA???
I'm not telling anyone until this drama dies and
I mean dies to the point that everyone forgets that all of the mess happened in the next couple of months and maybe I will tell everyone my new account when I'm closed to 15. I just came to this site to draw and make friends, not for this drama shit.
"I DON'T BELIEVE YOU !"
Again, be that way. I'm not forcing you to, I'm trying to clear up everything that's happening.
"WHY WAS MY COMMENT OR COMMENTS WAS HIDDEN?"
I had a amazing friend in real life to do so since seeing all of those comments will just make me when more depress and I don't want deal with that.
"CAN YOU JUST DEACTIVATE YOUR ACCOUNT?"
no since I forgot the password for the e-mail I used for this account and when I try to change the e-mail it keeps saying that the password is wrong but it's not but I care less since this account is dead to me.
"NOT ANYONE HAS TO LIKE YOU."
I know, it's the internet but this whole drama thing is unneeded, this is a damn art site not
Screenshots, from the user who I censored
i.imgur.com/czrcMF2.png
*point , again my typing skills are shit.
i.imgur.com/0st0Xgi.png
i.imgur.com/SMj3lsI.png
i.imgur.com/5KdgNWu.png
Screenshots, from Sapphy (don't even dare to attack her.)
i.imgur.com/Jl75utR.png
i.imgur.com/J9cLqvT.png
i.imgur.com/8kn6jSY.png
i.imgur.com/GE9mGS2.png
Now I promise myself not to push my anger onto others and just talk about it to others in real life. To the people who hate me, be a hateful fuel machine and to the people I hate, I don't hate you anymore and that goes for anyone who I attacked in the past months (I can't named them since I don't remember who they are), you're off my hate list and I hope you stay off.
like look at this: i.imgur.com/rCVShxS.png
GOD, I was a huge asshole. I didn't deleted all of my files in this sta.sh and just copy and pasted all of my custom box info to save anything if I get core again or transfer my core to my account.
Even if you still hate me, be that way and just "help" my depression, have a good time with that and to the supports who are still on my side, thank you for anything and trying to make the drama go die in a drain. Seriously, this bullshit got out of hand like holy fuck people. I started bitching like a five year old about some rant video that I love so much now because I was acting like some toxic bitch and everyone is talking about it like, what a bunch of fucking stalkers holy hell man. I don't stalk people over the internet and you shouldn't be as well because that's not right and just plain creepy and wrong, I know the internet isn't private and all but stalking someone's every more is creepy, don't be like that.
I even draw a joke picture of myself, i.imgur.com/YAg75b0.png ; Do you think I'm joking about this journal now? I know I was some toxic and trying to be "hardcore" bitch, that everyone had to listen me for answers and shit.
would you hear from me again?
sure, maybe in the next months if this drama DIES or maybe not until someone finds someone else to attack and harass.
I dreamed about doing rants on dA users but I can realized how toxic they can be. There's a lot of fucked up users on dA, people who steal artwork, trace images, and recolors, people uploading NSFW images, claiming people to be pedo defenders (that shit got annoying after the first time, troll or not), telling people to kill themselves (PE013), and some 30+ man was dating a 13 year old girl and pretended to be 16 to date her and I get a rant??? If you do rants about dA users, be careful or shit like this will happen again since history repeats itself and I don't going to be apart of it. People can change but everyone's actions are not helping me at all, I want to change without people forcing me to.
Okay about my characters and adopts,
They still belong to me and always, I'm not giving them anyway but I was too egoistical about them since people do like them and they are the best oc's I made in two years because my old ones suck and unoriginal. My characters are based off of how I want to be in real life but my characters are not prefect and I never claimed they're the best characters in the sonic fanbase , everyone has flaws but since Xyrina is named after this spam account, I made three new characters and the ones feature on this account will still be used. I'm not selling anymore characters and I really wished I didn't sell that space custom that someone made for me but it's too late now to get the adopts I sold back at this time.
Now this is part where I'm disappointed for everyone who's attacking everyone who is on my side....you guys are more awful than me and once again hypocritical since you're being rude to my supporters, that's toxic and uncalled for. That's pretty rude by itself, just saying. It's their opinion and you shouldn't be bashing and attacking them, your opinion will be invalided when you start calling the supporters horrible things that I can't even think of, your own statement dies and doesn't support your argument anymore. I censored the user who send me the message username so they don't get harassed, by the way whoever "leaked" my Tumblr like celebrity nudes, you're the great because I would have never got this info. (by the way, I changed accounts so people will not send me negative messages.) I mean everything I said in that message, grown the fuck up. There's some user (again I forget things) that I own points to and they can called me "shit" and they're older than me like they pay bills, their partner says they have to pay bills who a adult bullying a minor, that doesn't sound right at all and I got blacklisted from two users so I can't commissioned them anymore....I'm okay with that. (They are the user who made the space custom).
Someone 20+ woman made a journal on me and it had something across the lines of me hating her friend's oc (who is also 20+ years old) because of a shipping, look I care less about people's ocs now and only care for my own now and for now on, but you're worry about some random ass 14 year old girl hating (hate that I only told someone once about but not all over the place like some) and both of you guys are in your twenties though like why do you care anyway? My opinion change on the oc and the user themselves, I don't even care for both of them and the user should just ignore me but seriously , I don't make hate stamps on the users or ocs I dislike like come on people, forget about me and move on.
But for the rude comments (plus journals) and the video itself (if it's still up, I'm too lazy to check), it drove me to suicide, do you feel better about yourself driving a young girl close to death? You're a horrible person and down right sick in the head. My family wanted to contact YouTube to take down the video and deviantart to report the users who the comments and journals that drove me to suicide if I did really committed suicide, you would have been feeling awful for killing a teen who made dumb edgy "rude" comments and horrible mistakes, you're acting my childish than my delete and old call out journals. I thought the people who are against me wasn't the rude individuals at all.
Why did I act all "badass" and "rude", okay...I was bullied in school and that hellish rage was bottled up inside and instead of talking to people I know in real life about it, I was like "let's be a huge ass to everyone so they can feel my pain!" smartest plan in the galaxy, give me a medal but to be real, not everyone on dA is nice people like have you seen half of the people on this site Everyone has to understand that dA is full of sunshine and happiest with rainbow and sprinkle unicorns people but to be fair and well...the video shouldn't had been uploaded. She has two accounts and I only block her on one and I have another account as well, I would have been happy to but the video really? Did she wanted a respond video of me bitching around? No since I know better than to do that and also, I can't edit videos for nothing. Why I'm stop using fake names? All of them gave me a fake identity and personality that I wanted to have in real life. I'm actually some shy black girl who rarely talks in school, only talks to my close friend circle, gets bad grades time to time, and draws sonic and whatnot, I'm not popular in school. I acted like a big shot since I don't have to look into someone's eyes to tell them off since I rarely speak up for myself or yours.
now I know I will get comments just like this:
"WHAT ! FAKE YOUR DEATH YOU STUPID BITCH!"
.....I have no respond to this since I don't want to go back and forward with anyone at this point because I'm bored of it. Again, be closed minded and hard headed like I was before but seriously, you have no proof since you're not in my life. I just had a nervous breakdown and had to go to therapy for this and other problems, I'm still counting myself as suicidal since this whole thing about me depress and questioning my own actions.
"DON'T COME BACK TO DA YOU WHORE!"
Sorry but this is the only site I can post my artwork that is easy to use
and you can't tell me to leave since I'm a starting artist who wants to improve like everyone else but I'm going to stop being egoistical (aka fake confidence) to make myself feel like a real person with friends who care for me.
"WHAT'S YOUR NEW DA???
I'm not telling anyone until this drama dies and
I mean dies to the point that everyone forgets that all of the mess happened in the next couple of months and maybe I will tell everyone my new account when I'm closed to 15. I just came to this site to draw and make friends, not for this drama shit.
"I DON'T BELIEVE YOU !"
Again, be that way. I'm not forcing you to, I'm trying to clear up everything that's happening.
"WHY WAS MY COMMENT OR COMMENTS WAS HIDDEN?"
I had a amazing friend in real life to do so since seeing all of those comments will just make me when more depress and I don't want deal with that.
"CAN YOU JUST DEACTIVATE YOUR ACCOUNT?"
no since I forgot the password for the e-mail I used for this account and when I try to change the e-mail it keeps saying that the password is wrong but it's not but I care less since this account is dead to me.
"NOT ANYONE HAS TO LIKE YOU."
I know, it's the internet but this whole drama thing is unneeded, this is a damn art site not
Screenshots, from the user who I censored
i.imgur.com/czrcMF2.png
*point , again my typing skills are shit.
i.imgur.com/0st0Xgi.png
i.imgur.com/SMj3lsI.png
i.imgur.com/5KdgNWu.png
Screenshots, from Sapphy (don't even dare to attack her.)
i.imgur.com/Jl75utR.png
i.imgur.com/J9cLqvT.png
i.imgur.com/8kn6jSY.png
i.imgur.com/GE9mGS2.png
Now I promise myself not to push my anger onto others and just talk about it to others in real life. To the people who hate me, be a hateful fuel machine and to the people I hate, I don't hate you anymore and that goes for anyone who I attacked in the past months (I can't named them since I don't remember who they are), you're off my hate list and I hope you stay off.
like look at this: i.imgur.com/rCVShxS.png
GOD, I was a huge asshole. I didn't deleted all of my files in this sta.sh and just copy and pasted all of my custom box info to save anything if I get core again or transfer my core to my account.
Even if you still hate me, be that way and just "help" my depression, have a good time with that and to the supports who are still on my side, thank you for anything and trying to make the drama go die in a drain. Seriously, this bullshit got out of hand like holy fuck people. I started bitching like a five year old about some rant video that I love so much now because I was acting like some toxic bitch and everyone is talking about it like, what a bunch of fucking stalkers holy hell man. I don't stalk people over the internet and you shouldn't be as well because that's not right and just plain creepy and wrong, I know the internet isn't private and all but stalking someone's every more is creepy, don't be like that.
I even draw a joke picture of myself, i.imgur.com/YAg75b0.png ; Do you think I'm joking about this journal now? I know I was some toxic and trying to be "hardcore" bitch, that everyone had to listen me for answers and shit.
would you hear from me again?
sure, maybe in the next months if this drama DIES or maybe not until someone finds someone else to attack and harass.
I dreamed about doing rants on dA users but I can realized how toxic they can be. There's a lot of fucked up users on dA, people who steal artwork, trace images, and recolors, people uploading NSFW images, claiming people to be pedo defenders (that shit got annoying after the first time, troll or not), telling people to kill themselves (PE013), and some 30+ man was dating a 13 year old girl and pretended to be 16 to date her and I get a rant??? If you do rants about dA users, be careful or shit like this will happen again since history repeats itself and I don't going to be apart of it. People can change but everyone's actions are not helping me at all, I want to change without people forcing me to.
Again, I'm not replying to any comments or reading them, ain't going to happen, someone else can do that for me.
If you make a Tumblr account to follow me and to harass me some more, I'm blocking you and straight up reporting you, I don't want the drama to spill onto Tumblr since
it's the only site I can enjoy at this time and it makes me feel better. Another note to my "haters" (using that word is making me cringe has much I remember how toxic I was), you better be happy that I'm alive if not, you're a sick bastard and deserves a serious rant on you because if you're happy that someone
it's the only site I can enjoy at this time and it makes me feel better. Another note to my "haters" (using that word is making me cringe has much I remember how toxic I was), you better be happy that I'm alive if not, you're a sick bastard and deserves a serious rant on you because if you're happy that someone
who hated dead, someone is clearly wrong with you not me. I grown up to the point I'm making this journal but I didn't reading the comments or going into my messages because
depression and anxiety isn't going to help me as I look at the messages,
This wrong drama thing has made me when more depressed, this really needs to stop, you're not helping me, SanicFlanic, or yourself.
Just fueling the fire and everyone is getting dragged into it and it's disgusting. Even though I hated people, do you see me drawing hate art and posting hate stamps about the people who I dislike? (If there's hate stuff of me, I'm going to facepalm so much) No because there's no need for this drama. Ever since people like PE013 came onto dA, people have been feeding off the drama and it' unneeded on a damn art site.
This site is already going down hill and the drama is making go down even more, no wonder deviantart's reputation that this site is full of drama and cry babies.
I'm done with drama forever, don't drag me down that drama hell hole. This drama is boring and unneeded and didn't need to happen but it did.
((If anyone calls me "Rocket" in the comments, that's proof that you didn't read the whole journal to the end.))
I know that I lose half of my friends from this, I only have one (or two) point at this point since she's a the only one to contact me after I left deviantart but this whole drama is again, unneeded and pointless. I wanted to post my artwork and make friends, I don't wanna become this or this to happen, I was whole "rude" 49% of the time but to the users who spammed this account with rude messages, you're not nice yourself at all and should left it alone, fighting rudest with rudest isn't helping anyone.
NOW
stop with the journals or whatever else on me
if you made any type of journal on me, remove them / it please since this drama is over and shouldn't be remember. I want a fresh start on this site because people can change, I don't want to be label as PE013 2.0 or something, I didn't come on this site for drama at all and it's toxic.
This drama has destroyed my attitude in real life, I go to school crying at some points, I had to be send home since I wouldn't do my classwork in school just crying in class.
I can't even draw my own fan characters anyone because of this drama bullshit.
Jay Out --
I will maybe not come back to dA or released my new dA now at all, again maybe in couple of months when I'm close to 15 since I know people are just going to spam the account just to run me off of dA.
I'm not forcing you to believe me in my statements , I just want the drama to stop and the being the talk of dA, I didn't want this but karma is a bitch.
depression and anxiety isn't going to help me as I look at the messages,
This wrong drama thing has made me when more depressed, this really needs to stop, you're not helping me, SanicFlanic, or yourself.
Just fueling the fire and everyone is getting dragged into it and it's disgusting. Even though I hated people, do you see me drawing hate art and posting hate stamps about the people who I dislike? (If there's hate stuff of me, I'm going to facepalm so much) No because there's no need for this drama. Ever since people like PE013 came onto dA, people have been feeding off the drama and it' unneeded on a damn art site.
This site is already going down hill and the drama is making go down even more, no wonder deviantart's reputation that this site is full of drama and cry babies.
I'm done with drama forever, don't drag me down that drama hell hole. This drama is boring and unneeded and didn't need to happen but it did.
((If anyone calls me "Rocket" in the comments, that's proof that you didn't read the whole journal to the end.))
I know that I lose half of my friends from this, I only have one (or two) point at this point since she's a the only one to contact me after I left deviantart but this whole drama is again, unneeded and pointless. I wanted to post my artwork and make friends, I don't wanna become this or this to happen, I was whole "rude" 49% of the time but to the users who spammed this account with rude messages, you're not nice yourself at all and should left it alone, fighting rudest with rudest isn't helping anyone.
NOW
stop with the journals or whatever else on me
if you made any type of journal on me, remove them / it please since this drama is over and shouldn't be remember. I want a fresh start on this site because people can change, I don't want to be label as PE013 2.0 or something, I didn't come on this site for drama at all and it's toxic.
This drama has destroyed my attitude in real life, I go to school crying at some points, I had to be send home since I wouldn't do my classwork in school just crying in class.
I can't even draw my own fan characters anyone because of this drama bullshit.
Jay Out --
I will maybe not come back to dA or released my new dA now at all, again maybe in couple of months when I'm close to 15 since I know people are just going to spam the account just to run me off of dA.
I'm not forcing you to believe me in my statements , I just want the drama to stop and the being the talk of dA, I didn't want this but karma is a bitch.
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